It’s not uncommon to think that men should make the first move when it comes to dating and relationships. Society has taught us that men are leaders and do the chasing. While society has evolved (for the better, in my humble opinion) and we have overcome many outdated views and morals that don’t reflect our modern society, do women approach men they are romantically interested in when it comes to dating?
There is no doubt that women like to be pursued by men. It makes us feel desired and can be a great confidence boost, but for many women, approaching a man they are romantically interested can be very frightening. Even the thought of it is enough to put us off. However, modern women are continuing to break stereotypes and outdated views in all areas of life, and dating is no exception!
Daisy In The Dust asked various women of all ages , if they would be willing to make the first move on someone they were romantically interested in, and the reason behind it if they would (or wouldn’t). With a mixed bag of opinions, here is what we found…….
Reasons women don’t approach men
Tradition
Lesley, 56 – tells Daisy In The Dust “Approaching a man isn’t something I would do because I was raised in a generation where women didn’t really do that sort of thing. I know times have changed, and women are much more forthcoming, but I just don’t think I would have the confidence”
Fear of rejection
Savannah, 28, a Housing Officer, admits she has a fear of rejection so making the first move would be a ‘no go’ for her. “I’d be mortified if he said he wasn’t interested, or I wasn’t his type. I think it would crush my confidence. I would much rather give him a ‘vibe’ and let him do the rest.”
It’s emasculating for a man
Aleesha , 35, feels that men are natural leaders, she tells Daisy In The Dust…”Men like to chase, so when this role is taken way from them, it’s emasculating for them”
Men will feel like they don’t have to try
Bianca, 35, explains that she thinks men will feel they don’t have to try or put in any work if the women approaches them first. “It could set a negative tone for the relationship and he could feel like he is the prize”
Reasons women do approach men
It’s empowering
Lavon, 34, states “I see no issues in a woman approaching a man, as it allows women to be in control and is empowering.
It builds confidence
Amy, 22, a Research Assistant, states.. “If I see a man I like, I have no issues making the first move., but it wasn’t always like this, I used to be scared to do it. The issue is, most women overthink it. Once you get to grips with the fact that it’s not that serious, they are either interested or not, you kind of get over it a bit. Approaching men has definitely built my confidence and helped me to do things I fear the most.
It builds resilience
Emma, 44, feels that most women don’t approach men because they fear they will be rejected… “rejection isn’t a bad thing, life is full of rejection, its something we face numerous times in life. I’ve built resilience from approaching men first and they have declined, because it has helped me manage how I handle rejection, and I can get move on from it, easily and quickly now!
You have more success in dating
Chantelle, 21, tells Daisy In The Dust….” I approach men that I like, and I think I have had more success because of it. I think women forget that not all men feel comfortable approaching women first and they too can fear rejection. If you rely on men to do the approaching then you could be missing out on something great, so just go after what you want!”
