How To Make Friends In Your 30s

Struggling to make friends in your 30s? Yeah, it certainly gets harder, doesn’t it, which is exactly why we are going to delve into how to make friends when you are in your 30s.

I moved to London from a small city in my late 20s and I was desperate to build a social circle of people whom I connected with and who had similar interests.

I wanted to find my tribe of queens that were similar to me, whom I could laugh and cry with, a circle of girlfriends that would be there for one another through the good times and the bad, and people with whom I could simply ‘do life with’. 

It took a while for me to find people who were right for me, and along the way, I did make some friends that turned out to not be for me at all and those friendships ended, Until I made various friends who were exactly what I was looking for.

Making friends in your 30s or beyond is not easy, and this is simply because as we get older there are usually fewer opportunities to make new friends, compared to when we are younger and we are more likely to experience situations and environments that make it easy to make friends, such as College and University, where its mostly everyone’s desire to build friendships.

People in their 30s are more likely to have already established solid friendships so less open to committing time to meet new people and make new friends. Research also shows that friendships start to dwindle after the age of 25 and this may be due to starting families and moving etc.

Having families and partners may mean you have less time to build solid friendships even if you do meet new people, after all, good friendships need time and nurturing.

Don’t let any of this put you off, because having good friends comes with amazing benefits. According to Very Well Mind this includes, a better immune system, reduced stress and increased longevity.  

The following list will show you How to make friends in your 30s:

1. Download an app

In this day and age, everything we need isn’t hard to come by and is usually easily accessible by our smartphones; downloading an app at the click of a button.

This goes for making friends too, as we there are plenty of apps specifically catered to finding pals! Even some popular dating apps have sections for those looking for friendships.

Give it a try! You have nothing to lose and a whole friendship to gain!

2. Join groups

Whatever your interests are, you should join groups and attend classes, webinars and network events for anything that sparks your interest. This way you are more likely to meet people that you have a lot in common with and that share the same values, morals and interests as you!

3. Be social

If you want to make new friends, then I am going to need you to be social, because a stranger is not going to knock on your door and ask you if want to be best friend!

Try and be as social as you can, even during times when you would prefer to have had a night in front of the T.V.

Avoid turning down invitations where possible and made a conscious effort to socialize. This is because it provided me with opportunities to meet people and get to know those who had invited me out, which in turn can lead to lasting friendships!

4. Take advantage of what is on offer at work

Work can be a great way to meet people, however, sometimes work friendships can stay within the workplace rather than filtering out into your personal life, so you need to ensure you are putting yourself out there! Why not ask a colleague whom you get n well with to go for a drink after work or meet up on the weekend for a coffee?

Also, avoid limiting yourself to people that you work directly with or are in your team. Chances are your company has lots of people who you be compatible with for friendship, you just need to seek them out. You can do this by being sure to attend office parties, be friendly with people who you cross paths with and join groups and networks your company may offer for example lots of companies have BAME and LGBTQ+ networks that you could join.

If you are feeling brave you may even want to take the lead in arranging something where colleagues can get together if your workplace does not do anything social!

5. Use social media

Social media is the way we all can be a great way to make friends. You can tell a lot about a person’s interests from their social media, so it can be a good way to determine if you have the potential to get on, and you may find it much easier to send someone a message online if you find approaching people face to face daunting or you are more introverted.

6. Join the gym

Gyms are a great place to meet people, in fact, lots of people seek out gym buddies to keep fit with and there is no reason this can’t turn into real lasting friendships! The bonus is you get to keep fit and healthy whilst making friends! Win-win if you ask me!

Things to remember

Be patient

It’s unlikely you will find a good circle of friends straight away, it will likely take time, especially if you want good quality friends that you have deep connections with and similar interests!

You will probably meet people only to find later that they are not the kind of friends you want in your life, but don’t let that put you off! you won’t necessarily hit it off with everyone you meet straight away and it won’t always work out and that is totally okay!

Check your vibe

Be the person whom you want to make friends with! Having a good vibe will attract people to you and would you want to meet someone who is happy, positive, friendly and kind? Then be that person, and project a good attitude when you are socializing or around people in general.

Smile, be friendly, and compliment people. No one is going to be interested in getting know someone who is unapproachable, rude or unfriendly! Don’t let people get the wrong impression of you!

Don’t settle

Don’t settle for people who don’t make you feel good, display toxic behaviours, who make you feel uncomfortable or put pressure on you to be someone you are not.

Being around the wrong people for you can severely impact your health, well-being and quality of life! No friendships are worth going against your own values and morals or being someone who you are not!

Keeping friends is just as important as making them

Once you have made friends, you need to be able to keep them so be sure to value and be grateful for your friendships, and treat people how you want to be treated!

Having good friends could really improve the quality of your life and do positively impact your emotional and mental well-being!

Remember maintaining friendships requires trust, honesty, compromise, appreciation, compassion and support to say the least! Treat one another well, look after one another and your friendships will bloom!

Be open

If you meet someone that seems not to have the same interests as you, don’t completely shut it down, there are plenty of people who have thriving friendships with people whom they would describe as total opposites and it’s the differences that make the friendship special!

We hope that this post will help you with your journey to making great new friends…. Good luck!