Welcome to the dating diaries, where we speak to real people about their dating experiences. We cover the good, the bad and the ugly of the dating world. Our aim is to not only entertain you, but help our readers to navigate their own dating lives, by picking up tips and learning from other people’s experiences.
19 year old Amy (a uni student) dates Jason – 20 year old uni student
*Names have been changed to maintain confidentiality*
Where did you meet?
“We went to the same uni, although we were on different courses and based on different campuses; we met at the uni bar on one of our campuses. They had a game night on, and we were put on the same team.
He seemed like a nice guy, and we were getting on well. Afterwards, we all went back to his mate’s flat, and we ended up having a bit of a party!
We kept in touch, texting and calling and messaging and it wasn’t long before he asked me on a date”
Where was your date?
“He suggested we go to a Greek restaurant that was fairly local to both of us. It was local to both of us, and I had been plenty of times before and loved the food there. it was good value for money!”
How did it go?
“We met at the restaurant, and I felt like we had a connection. he was making me laugh, plus we had a lot in common.
When the bill had been paid, we both ordered Ubers, we couldn’t hare as we were both opposite ways. His Uber came before mine, so we said our goodbyes, and I sat waiting for mine to arrive.
When he left, one of the waitresses approached me and said that she didn’t mean to be rude or want me to take it the wrong way, but she had noticed I was on a date with Jason, and they had broken up for about 3 months.
She went on to say that they had a bad break-up, and she had to block him from everything as he was harassing her. She said she found it weird that he would bring me to the restaurant he knows she works at on the day he knew she would likely be working, so she thought I should know.”
“I was so shocked but grateful that she had told me! I gave her my number as my Uber arrived, and she was working, so we couldn’t really get into things. She told me her shift finished in an hour and she would call me afterwards!
True to her word, she called me, and we talked about their relationship and breakup. It turns out that she had ended up breaking up with him because she described him as a ‘narcissists’ who used to gaslight her a lot and was quite controlling.
She told me he had taken the break up badly and would often bombard her with messages and calls until she had to block him!
We discussed that it was weird that he chose the one where his ex worked out of all the restaurants he could have picked.
She sent me pictures to prove they were together and not making it up, but honestly, I didn’t need them. I believed her!
We both concluded that I was just a pawn in his sick game to try and make his ex jealous, and this red flag was just too big to ignore!
She told me she had asked another waiter to serve us because she didn’t want to make things weird or awkward and felt uncomfortable.
It gave me weird, creepy vibes, and I wanted no part, so I blocked him. I also wanted her to be safe, so I tried to advise her; she was smart and said she would tell her boss and report him if he came to work again.
I thought about confronting him, but after what the waitress from the restaurant had told me, I didn’t want to put her in a compromising position or make things unsafe for her!”
Did you see one another again?
“I did see him a couple of times after that at some uni events, I just pretended like he didn’t exist. As for the waitress (his ex), I have seen her a couple of times when I have gone back to the restaurant, and she gave me a discount on my bill!”
What advice would you give to others that are dating?
“If you see red flags, pay attention to them and run as far as you can!”
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