Modern dating is difficult to navigate – just ask any of your single girlfriends searching for love, and I’m sure they’ll agree. It seems like it’s getting harder out there.
But aside from the challenges women face in dating, have you ever wondered how men are navigating modern dating? They don’t always talk about it, but behind the scenes, many men are turning to ChatGPT for dating advice.
I was curious, so I asked ChatGPT: What are men really seeking help with when it comes to dating? The answers were honest and surprisingly relatable.
They overthink the first message
Since dating apps are now a huge part of modern dating, it’s no wonder that men are asking ChatGPT how to start conversations on them. It shows that a lot of men want to make a good first impression when they slide into your direct messages. I am not at all surprised this came up because many women still expect men to contact first, so the pressure is on them to lead, and they clearly want to learn how to do that properly.
They regularly ask for examples of first messages, so I bet many of you have received DMs written by ChatGPT! Personally, I think more men should approach ChatGPT for this advice because the opening one-liners that have reached my inbox are wild!
They are scared of being ghosted
You and your girls probably have stories for days about you or someone you know being ghosted. However, you feel about ghosting, whether you do it or have done it in the past, turns out this is a big concern for men too. ChatGPT says this is high on their list of queries, so while you’re fearing getting ghosted, he probably is too! Can we all just stop ghosting and have the courage and courtesy to tell someone when we’re not interested?
Aside from this, men are concerned about getting no replies on dating apps, which leaves them questioning if they’re attractive or if they need to change their profiles. They also ask ChatGPT to review their profiles so they can achieve more success!
They don’t want to come across as a weirdo:
It appears that men are terrified of coming across as weird or creepy when it comes to dating. They’re stressing about saying the wrong thing that will freak women out and put them off completely. They don’t want to overstep when flirting, but they also don’t want to seem like they’re not keen. They totally want to play it cool, calm, and collected—and who can blame them, really?
They want to overcome shyness and social anxiety
Many women can relate to how dating feels when you have social anxiety or shyness, and it turns out men worry about this too. They don’t want this to impact their romantic lives!
They often ask how they can be more confident on in-person dates and how to handle rejection. It makes sense since not everyone they date is going to be feeling them!
They want help with planning dates
It appears a lot of guys need help planning first dates. They’re unsure whether to keep it casual with drinks or coffee, go all out with a meal, or be a bit more adventurous.
While on the date, they worry about how to keep the conversation flowing so there aren’t awkward silences. Girl, the men are trying!
They think nice guys finish last
Men are expressing concern that women prefer “bad boys,” and they’re wondering why the “bad boy” persona seems to be a hit. They believe that despite being a good guy, they get overlooked. I guess it’s similar to how some of us women feel overlooked because men want “baddies” who look a certain way!
Navigating exclusivity talks
I remember a male friend once telling me it was only ever women who brought up the “What are we?” talk. Well, this proves him wrong, because according to ChatGPT, men want to know how to bring this up without scaring women off! We need more “What are we?” talks in the dating scene because it feels like a lot of these men are just playing us otherwise.
They have sex and intimacy worries
They query how to discuss sexual boundaries, and it seems they have a lot of worries about performance anxiety. This wasn’t in the very top queries, but according to ChatGPT, a lot of men still ask about a woman’s body count and whether they should care about it. It’s a spicy topic, but it reveals deeper insecurities around comparison, fear of not being enough, confusion over modern dating values, and, let’s be real, some internalised misogyny too. ChatGPT fields these questions a lot, proving that even in 2025, sexual pasts are still a sticking point for some.
They wonder where to meet women without dating apps
Dating app fatigue is real, ladies, and men are feeling it too. They’re asking ChatGPT where to meet women offline, maybe because they think they’ll be more successful, or maybe because, like many of us, they’re just fed up with swiping.
They are scared they will be alone forever
I found this one really interesting. As women, we’re doing an amazing job of being vulnerable online about how lonely we can feel, and we often speak up about fears of never finding a partner or settling down. You don’t see men opening up in this way at the same rate, so it’s quite validating to know they share the same fears we do.
Hopefully, this is a bit of hope that there are good men out there who also want to settle down and start families one day.
It turns out men are just as nervous, thoughtful, and human in dating as we are. Behind every “hey” in your DMs, there might be a man who overthought that message, worried about ghosting, and wondered if he’ll be alone forever.
Next time you’re navigating the dating world, remember: we’re all just trying to figure it out, one awkward message at a time.
Related posts:
Powered by YARPP.
